Former United States President George Bush Sr. Thinks Of A Gun When He Plays With Himself by Ralph Haselmann Jr Former United States President George Bush Sr. thinks of a gun when he plays with himself! He imagines he's holding the cold steel blue muzzle of a gun as he furiously tugs away at his cock. "Yes yes yes I am not a wimp!", he mutters to himself as his climax draws near. All of a sudden he imagines he is Luke Skywalker from the movie Star Wars swooping into the gulley of the manmade Death Star Planet. All he has to do is drop a bomb in the shaft of the Death Star on target and it will fall to the center of the Death Star and blow it up. "I think I can I think I can!", he mutters to himself. . Only he is not Luke Skywalker, he is George Bush imagining he is waging war on Saddam Hussein, and Bush is honing in fast on his target. Saddam's house is now less than 100 feet away, and George can see him in the kitchen bay window, just sitting down to have some lentil soup for dinner George gets exited at the prospect of killing Saddam, and he feels a bloodlust stirring in his soul, and an itch in his groin. George is now furiously stroking his cock while fantasizing about bombing Saddam to Kingdom Come, "Unhh unhh here it comes yes yes!" A picture of his wife pops into his head just before orgasm and he mutters "God no!" as he reaches for the joystick to release the bomb over Saddam's house. 5.4.3.2.1. KERPLOW! And what a hit, right on target! An orange fireball rises from Saddam's rooftop as shards of metal, wood, glass and roof shingles explode in the air and fall all over the place. Saddam lies dead, slumped face down on his kitchen floor in a pool of blood. .At the moment he imagines the bomb impacts, George Bush has a mind-blowing earth-shattering orgasm. Better than sex with his mother, er, wife! He shoots cum three feet into the air and it falls back onto his lips. George tastes it and it tastes salty. George imagines it is the blood of Saddam Hussein, or So Dumb Insane, as George liked to call him. All of a sudden George imagines he is motoring down Pennsylvania Avenue in a tickertape parade in his honor. A big crowd has come out to wish him well; they are shouting "George! George!" Confetti is flying everywhere. George is loving it and is waving furiously to the crowd. Somewhere in California Ronald Reagan pops his head up from his coffin (wait, he isn't dead yet, is he?) and starts tapping his toes, moving his head from side to side like the Disneyland Hall of Presidents Animatronics, snapping his fingers, and singing You're A Grand Old Flag, You're A High Flying Flag. George Bush, you and Ronald Reagan had a 12 year fascist dictatorship reign You disrespected the wishes of most Americans and most citizens worldwide when you went ahead and had a Gulf War despite vehement protests, just so you could make money for your defense contractor buddies. Tell me though, can you put a price on a human head? George Bush, you disrespected gays when you told a gay activist to "Sit down and shut up!" when he disrupted your speech to protest how Aids wasn't being addressed by the administration. Yes, he was wrong to have interrupted your little speech, but you displayed a viciousness, a mean-spiritedness, and a homophobia that was just as ill-mannered as the person who interrupted you. Your war monger buddy Ronald Reagan didn't even mention Aids in his first term. I find it highly suspicious that the first reports of Aids started coming out right after Reagan took office in 1981. I'm not into conspiracy theories, but I think Aids was a hoax and a plot by the Reagan administration to silence gays and artists and win the favor of the religious right and conservatives. It's also quite glaringly obvious that John Lennon was murdered by the Reagan administration because Lennon was about to come out of five years of retirement to vociferously protest the imminent election of Reagan. So, I'm onto your game, Ronald and George Look at your game, girl (Charles Manson song, covered by Guns N Roses). And George Bush, you pulled the utter bullshit of listing a hotel in Texas as your main residency to avoid paying taxes. What jaw-dropping criminal scheming! If any other U.S. citizen pulled that crap, we'd be arrested and thrown in jail. But just because you're the President you can get away with it. You have balls, George, you have balls. I think the thousand points of light are emanating from the holes in your head. George Bush suddenly imagines his next targets, Fidel Castro, Manuel Noriega, and Muamar Khaddafi. He imagines the trajectory of he night time bombing of these dictators looks like a video game as the white bomb blips move across the night time sky caught by the infra red cameras. Well, I've got news for you. Bedtime for Bonzo. Sit down and shut up. GAME OVER. Ralph Haselmann Jr.'s Bio Ralph Haselmann Jr. was born on October 4, 1965 and lives in the lush rolling green hills of Morristown, NJ. He graduated from Mason Gross School Of The Arts, Rutgers (New Brunswick, New Jersey) in 1990 with a BFA in Graphic Design. He proceeded to paint houses for 11 years after school because it paid much more. He edits the critically lauded Lucid Moon Review Poetry Website, www.lucidmoonpoetry.com, which has been called the best poetry website on the internet, a valuable resource for poets, and is highly rated by Google. His first two poetry books, Wounded Heart, Naked Soul and Scattershot Haze, are available at Xlibris at 1-888-7xlibris, www.Xlibris.com , www.Amazon.com , www.BarnesandNoble.com , and www.Borders.com . In October 2001, Ralph was in a horrible, serious, near-fatal car accident, which left him paralyzed below the waist and in his right writing hand. Ralph is not wallowing in anger or self-pity, rather he is rededicating his life to promoting and publishing the works of others and himself. Remarkably, he can type with an adaptive keyboard and use a mouse pad to work on his website. Ralph is a member of The Writer's Bridge, a group which will help place his writings in magazine markets that will pay him. Ralph is also a proud member of Peta, not People For The Ethical Treatment Of Animals, but the other one, People Eating Tasty Animals! Ralph has given poetry readings at The Shaker CafĂ© in Flemington NJ and The Back Fence in NYC. If you would like to reprint his writings or correspond with him, he can be reached at: Lucid Moon Review Poetry Website and Newsletter, Ralph Haselmann Jr., editor Morris Hills Center, Room 427 W, 77 Madison Ave., Morristown, NJ 07960 (973) 993-9744, ralphylucidmoon@yahoo.com, www.lucidmoonpoetry.com. © Copyright 2005 Ralph Haselmann Jr. and Lucid Moon Review Poetry Website www.lucidmoonpoetry.com
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